I watched Legend for the first time the other day…my, my, my…how come no one ever told me it’s one of the worst films ever made?!

Endangered unicorns, Tom Cruise as a dainty nature boy, and more bubbles than Willy Wonka can shake his cane at?  How Ridley Scott followed The Duellists, Blade Runner, and Alien with this debacle is beyond me.

To be fair, I watched the “Director’s Cut” with the Jerry Goldsmith score, and I understand the stage burned down mid-production, forcing them to re-build with little time, and less money…but that’s no excuse for this amateur hour piece of filmmaking.

Yes, Tim Curry’s make-up as “Darkness” is quite impressive and effective, but beyond that, Legend is suitable for a drinking game, and nothing more.

Am I missing something fantasy fans?

Jimmy and I have an unshakable Werner Herzog fetish. Vice Magazine recently published an interview with the man responsible for Fitzcarraldo, Grizzly Man, and let’s not forget, Even Dwarfs Started Small.

In the piece, Werner discusses his admiration for NBA players, his belief in downsizing film crews (just look at that picture of him manning the Rescue Dawn slate all by himself!), and how Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans might be the most hilarious movie he’s ever made.

To read the article, go here…and if you want more Werner, he just published a book of Fitzcarraldo reflections entitled, Conquest of the Useless. Special thanks to my girl Nini for the hot tip on this.

Our good friends over at Slash Film reported this at the beginning of the month, but in case you missed it, The New York Times Magazine published a wonderful article about music video mastermind – diehard skateboarder – movie mold breaker Spike Jonze, and the trials and tribulations involved in bringing Where The Wild Things Are to the big screen.

If you’re not already a member of NYT Online, you’ll have to register…but it’s quick, free, and well worth it. To check it out, go here.

Mark Romanek – director of the underrated One Hour Photo and dozens of the best music videos your eyeballs ever saw – helmed this commercial for ESPN a few years back.  Entitled “Makeshift,” this one-minute clip will make a sports lover out of anyone…and most likely, bring back a few memories from your childhood.

Romanek’s next film, Never Let Me Go, is slated for a 2010 release…and I cannot wait.  To visit his spectacularly moody website click here, and if you don’t own it already, do yourself a favor and purchase Director’s Series Vol. 4 – The Work of Mark Romanek…he’s a visual maestro.

Hal Ashby is one of those directors that I hold dear to my heart.  

Harold and Maude has a permanent place in my “Top Five.” The Last Detail is endlessly watchable, subtle, and heartfelt. Being There is one of the smartest comedies of all time, and perhaps, Peter Sellers finest hour. Coming Home is one of the most honest portraits of Vietnam ever committed to film. And, The Landlord, is an underrated cult masterpiece.

Not to mention, he was an Oscar-winning editor of such films as In the Heat of the Night, The Thomas Crown Affair, and The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming.

Thank the cinema gods that Hal is finally getting his due in a new book, “Being Hal Ashby,” by Nick Dawson. If you’re a fan of great movies, and you’d like to learn about this fascinating Hollywood outsider, pick it up. And if you want to hear more, KCRW’s Elvis Mitchell recently interviewed Dawson on his fantastic show, “The Treatment.”

I recently stumbled across this picture of Michael Bay and Co.

Funnily enough, immediately after, I developed a serious Russian roulette habit.

This picture has scarred me, but I feel a sick need to share it with all of you.

Even a liquid explosion won’t stop Werner Herzog.  I am giving you no choice, but to respect this man.

Piggy-backing on the Whatever Works episode…

I’ll be the first to admit, the last ten years have not been kind to Mr. Woody Allen.  

Of course, there’s flashes of greatness – Match Point, Sweet and Lowdown, and Vicky Cristina Barcelona – but those gems are unfortunately sandwiched between such embarrassing debacles as Anything Else, Curse of the Jade Scorpion, Hollywood Ending, Celebrity, Small Time Crooks, and Melinda and Melinda.

With this in mind, I ask you to reconsider Woody Allen…standup comic.  Next time you find yourself planning a road trip, seek out this collection of his standup years between 1964 and 1968.

For the rest of the article and a CLIP, follow the jump…

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I don’t know if I’m in my right mind for posting something like this, but I will leave it to all the Marc Forster leg humpers to decide. Blofeld (I mean Forster) directed and acted (two careers he should reconsider) in this short film for Swiss International Airlines titled, LX Forty. It seems like this is Forster’s attempt to tell the world how much more he knows about the world just because he flies First Class. What about the rest of us stuck in economy buddy!?

Forster collaborated with MK12, the company that saves all Forster films from falling on their face, to create the visually stunning animation for this piece. The main site also has the Behind the Scenes Documentary and, of course, the Marc Forster Documentary, surprise surprise.  Next time, perhaps Swiss Air should reconsider their definition of an “airline commerical” before they decide to hire Marc Forster to direct it.

Just so you know I know something you may not know, doo dah doo dah!  We all know what happened to our boy Eddie. 

Click on the picture to feel the full flame.